Senin, 13 September 2010

my new boyfriend: do I have your blessing, Internet?

Check out the profile of this guy. Whaddaya think, he's the one for me?
SELF-SUMMARY:

Hi, I'm Bubba, I'm 4'10" and 465lbs. I'm grossly unattractive, eternally unemployed, unquestionably impotent, repulsively pathetic, arrogantly narcoleptic, trailer park living, hygienically disregarding, genital scratching, incontinent wearing, patholigical liar with a nasty attitude, bad breath, fashionably hairy back, an IQ of 75 and absolutely no sense of humor.

I desire an angry, self absorbed, egocentric, narcissistic, control freak type woman that appreciates and posseses similar virtues to mine for a long mutually demeaning relationship.

Added bonus if you are moody, manipulative, materialistic, or tantrum throwing. I also have a thing for big haired chicks who have taken out a ceiling fan or two with their hair-do, but even if you don't got big hair, as long as you got some of the above qualities, i'm all for it.


FAVORITE BOOKS


I don't read books. They're bad for you. All they do is give you bad ideas. Movies? I only watch the ones starring Ron Jeremy. I like the music at the tractor pulls...and as far as food goes, anything deep fried, specially possum


ON A TYPICAL FRIDAY NIGHT I AM...

sitting in my doublewide watching my relatives on the Jerry Springer Show while drinking a case of PBR

MESSAGE ME IF...

You're into short, round, illiterate men.

I don't think I'm angry enough for him though.

(Note: this was an actual profile on OkCupid -- I mean, I'm sure not an ACTUAL one, but I didn't make the wording up. Pretty hilarious!)

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