Rabu, 27 Januari 2010

you've got to be kidding me.

My entire day was spent in a reverse pac-man grid where I was chased not by ghosts but by giant fat molecules begging to be eaten.

At lunchtime I ducked the sweets and approached the cashier with a healthy salad. As I fumbled for cash, she shifted a basket of cookies under my nose and murmured seductively, "You won! Pick something."

Me: "I don't really want anything."

Her: "But they're FREEEEEEeeeeeeeee" -- her breath lingering on the word FREE, activating the opportunistic starving student part of my brain.

Her charms worked; I blacked out and came to moments later holding a package of cookies.

What have I done??

I realized with horror what had happened and held the evil package away from my body with the tippy part of my thumb and forefinger and accosted the first person I ran into down the hall. "Sam!! Cookies! I got these for free. Here!"

Yes! He was in but he only wanted one. sigh

What to do with the other cookie? No one was around so I folded the package nicely and left it on a coworker's calendar with a note. Then I swiveled back to my desk to enjoy my salad.

After lunch I got up for water and was accosted by more temptation.

A small but growing army of serotonin-deprived office staff (is there any other kind?) darted past like a pack of wild boars shrieking excitedly,"Cuupppcakes!!!", gathering additional throngs of the starving as they sprinted toward the high-carb prizes waiting in the conference room. I steeled myself and slunk back into my chair to chew on ice.

The rest of the day passed with cupcakes, cookies, sweets, and sugary evils flowing through the air like wind but I resisted each and every one.

Dinner out with friends, I resisted dessert.

At the movies, I looked away from the giant snack counter with its 3,000 calorie packs of peanut butter cups and sour patches and ice cream bars.

I avoided all of it.

My goal is to make it through two full weeks without sugar because someone said that's how long it takes for the cravings to pass. I'm almost halfway there.

I'm doing it because sugar makes my heart beat too fast and erratically and I don't feel good afterwards, as much as I love it. I'm ten pounds lighter now than I was this time last year and I want to get back to my old self. I don't even care about reaching a goal weight as much as I just want to feel the same in my skin as I did when I was my most fit and moving around was easy. I'm starting to feel that way again and I love it. And so I am trying to avoid junk.

I thought I made it through the day. I pulled up in the driveway and relaxed in my seat. I made it through the grid with bonus points.

Until I saw the package.

The package of cookies.

My friend Vaughn started a cookie company, Decadent Cookies, that has the Best. Cookies. I. Have. Ever. Eaten. In my life. EVER. Mrs. Fields, you got nothing on Vaughn. No one makes a cookie like him.

Cookies, delivered right to my door.

Not even home is safe.

Sigh.

I still haven't opened the box. (I actually am not craving them... yet.) I will have to get them out of the house before this changes...!

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