facebook rant

Joshlos and Hautepocket ranted about Facebook recently and now I'm piping in.

A bunch of people recently found me on Facebook but I rejected their requests because I didn't remember them. I made a funny comment about this but one new friend wrote, "Well I don't remember you but your name sounded familiar." I was all, "well, why did you friend me then?" But I didn't say it. She was sweet in high school so whatever. And also, I friended some peeps that may not have remembered me so I'm guilty of this too.

But it got me thinking. Here are my rules/requests for Facebook:

1. Please do not friend me if you don't know me. Don't use me just to beef up your friend list. Only friend me if you actually like me.

2. If you've ever tried to kick my ass, we probably were not great friends. If you fall under this category and I accepted your friend request anyway, it's only because I want to see what kind of trailer you're living in now. (Special exception: if you apologized for trying to kick my ass and we can now laugh about it.)

Note: Finding me on the internet only to call me a dork does NOT make us friends.

3. Enough with the quizzes! I don't care what kind of vampire you'd be, which insomniac lizard you'd make or what your chinese astrology profile was for one of your past lives. Quizzes are stupid*. Well maybe they're fun to fill out and even sometimes read -- I'm not a complete facebook quiz/game nazi -- but moderation is key, folks! (*exception: if I'm crazy about you, because then I love reading it all.)

-->Facebook request: can't you let me pick what kinds of info I want to receive??

4. Don't post every 7 minutes. Y'all are drowning out other peeps. I don't have time to login every day or scroll through several pages to read updates.

-->Facebook, can't you bring back the "see more/less about this person" feature??

5. Current friend management sucks. I actually got so overwhelmed by my news feed that I went online and researched how to manage it, which makes me a super double ultra nerd.

Anyway, I found strategies in a discussion forum (this is actually a hot topic -- I'm not the only dweeb trying to do this) and someone wrote that they create 3 lists: "we're friends," "we're friendly," and "we're acquaintances." You can customize who sees what.

So I started to do this. I got 3 people deep into my list before I tossed the whole idea. I'll just have to outsource this to my database manager, it's not worth the time.

6. Please don't be boring.

What's boring? Here's boring:

"They lost the game in 14 innings! Visitors scored 4 runs in the top of the 14th."

Why is this boring? Well, I hate sports. But really it's because I want to hear about YOU.

The actual update I borrowed this from wasn't so bad because it did actually include what they were doing, but I needed a good example for my blog so I edited it. (Sorry, friend, to throw you under the bus, but my blog stats are at stake!)

Yes, I am demanding with my Facebook rules, all of which I have violated myself sometime or another. But if we're friends, you already know this and like me anyway. :)